我错了

原本开开心心的一天又变成了吵架收场
感觉很纳闷很无奈，我只想珍惜的过每一天
整个12月的中尾都是雨季一直下雨下雨
令到我整个人都很不耐烦
可能是因为没有打球流汗，没地方发泄吧
好不容易去打球了，结果给我下大雨
更不幸的事情是既然扭到了脖子
想说算了，就休息几天然后去到数2010年
在这期间，小卢有很多生气的事情
一下子怀疑这个，一下子生气那个
几乎天天在生气和吵架当中吧
严格来说不是吵架因为我永远都是不对的那个
今天有个女生朋友找我聊天问最近怎样
我想说我们都没什么东西，就让小卢看看咯
结果不知道她看到了什么就生气了
我简单的分析了一些角度和看法
她觉得有了女友的男生不能跟别的女生聊天
而我已经慢慢的再改了，就差一点就成功了
在我的角度里，聊天其实是没什么的事情
只要不要太过分，言语上检点一些就可以了
我承认我以前在言语上实在太有点过火
但是在这段时间里我也慢慢的在改变了
这次我错了，我也真的改了，但她看不见了
对不起小卢

困惑

sigh，目前的我非常困惑，不了解到底女生要的是什么呢
谈了好几次恋爱失败不是没有原因的
我真的很困惑，不了解，没意见，不懂，空白
为了小事一件竟然可以发那么大的脾气
究竟是为什么呢？
譬如说我为了她做了9件事而没做到1件
她只记得我没做到的那一件事，却忘了我以前为了她做的
可能人就是这样，总记得最接近的
她生气我去吃东西而忘了问她要吃什么
看起来这是何等小事啊，但她会认为我不重视她
我那时真的一时忘了，再加上那是朋友请客的
我没告诉她这些，因为我知道她一定不理会
之前我起床后，一定问她要吃什么并煮面一起吃
她都忘了这些，这次我忘了问她就生气了
我没有要她会记得，她为我也做了很多
我跟她可以说是没什么好计较的，只希望不要为小事吵架
之后我马上问她是否要吃点什么东西，她却不说
如果那时她告诉我要吃什么，我一定会弄给她的
无论自己煮还是出去买，我一定会找给她
我知道她也为我做很多，我也尽量补偿回给她
尽量为她做更多，只不过就这次疏忽了
我们3天一小吵，5天一大吵，都不懂为了什么
我们在一起的日子不多了，真的不想浪费时间
更不想花宝贵的时间在吵架上
我现在的心情很平静，我没怪她，也没理由怪
说到底就是我的错，也许她生气是应该的
希望过多2天她的心情会恢复，知道我不是故意的
“相爱容易相处难”，这句话还满正确的
但是我还是爱她，不舍得放弃她...。
顺其自然吧....耶稣请帮帮忙
明天会去交功课了，希望一切顺利通过
如果没有我的“发泄天地”让我宣泄
我的EQ再高也会疯掉.....哈哈

年轻不要留白

聖誕節 快 到 了 ★ ★ ★　 ★ 　 　 ★　　　　
　 ★　 ★　MERRY X' Mas 　　　　 ★　　 　
& ‧°∴°﹒☆°． ‘ 　Happy New Year 　
★　　　　 　★　 　　　　‘ ★
把幸福傳給你唷 希望你喜歡 祝福你 聖誕快樂
順 如意 健康快樂 願你的未來都是一帆風順

╭┴┴─────┴┴╮
│　　　　　　　│＼｜／
│　●　　　　　●| ─☆─
│○　╰┬┬┬╯　○│／｜＼
│　　 ╰─╯　　　／
╰─┬○────┬○╯
╭│聖誕快樂！│╮
╰┴─────┴╯
18/12/2009又到了年为了真的过得很快
看回去刚刚来的时候才2月
一转眼就12月了，我的朋友家人们
下一个月就能见面了，真的好九不见
明天刚好是ahMiow的生日，生日快乐哦
这几天一直去打球，看来球技还待有进步
炼脚步肌肉才，跳得高才是王道
休息了好几天了，我的功课是时侯继续了
希望能平平安安得pass掉它
很多朋友都毕业了，而我还剩下一个学期
昨天跟Zac和朋友们出去喝酒，他毕业了
20号就回大马了，下次见面不知道何时何日了
不过还好是大马，见面的机会还是很高的
而小卢，很可能决定在23号青岛了
原本想说跟她过这里的圣诞节和新年
hmm..没办法咯...只好明年见了..我会想她的
而我的roommate 叶董，真是不懂他
天天窝在家里meetoto,连打球都懒惰，可能他不喜欢打球吧
不过他也顺利的毕业了但是还不能拿文凭
最近都在想，要怎么好好珍惜澳洲的生活呢
除了做功课，真的不想留在家里虚度光阴
更不想在浪费年轻的生活和时间
想生活比较踏实，有目标，希望，肯定，实力
现在正在忙功课的事情，也慢慢的调好生活规律
希望我以后能摆脱无所事事的日子
早早起床向着自己的目标迈进，努力
改变自己，做一点有意义的事情
因为年轻不要留白，别以后才后悔
我醒悟了，有心不怕迟，冲吧.......！

60 seconds with Jesus

He said (Matthew 10:32 & 33): "Everyone therefore who acknowledges me before others, I also will acknowledge before my Father in heaven; but whosoever denies me before others, I also will deny before my Father in heaven".

Yes, I love God. He is my source of life and my saviour. He keeps me alive day and night.
Without Him, I am nothing, but with Him "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me". Philippians 4:13.

Lord, you know the life of my family members. I ask You to bless him/her in all things and make him/her prosperous. Take care of his/her family, his/her health, his/her work and all his/her future plans. Lead him/her not into temptation, but deliver him/her from evil. In Jesus' name, amen.

我爱我家@澳洲7天之旅

轻松的一天，想好好做功课和休息
妈妈姐姐他们回家了
看到妈妈弟弟他们来的时候
真的有点感动。。哈哈
这7天真的很累，到处去玩也花了不少阿
看到妈妈弟弟他们来了，也很兴奋很高兴
谢谢aunty 谢谢妈妈，姐姐也顺毕业了
而我离回家的日子不远了
不到一个月的时间

老师给我最后一个机会
就是让我做supplementary assessment
希望能pass掉那科，23号到期
这次真的不能再fail了。。。
不能再度让妈妈难过了，最后的冲刺~！！
努力啊，感谢主耶稣的帮忙。。。
关了一道们也开了一扇窗给我。。阿们

我觉得我总部善于表达
面对任何人都好像木木呆呆的
也不会说话，是我内向造成的么？！
就因为这样总是会发生误会
这几天让小卢不开心了，真的对不起
无论如何我一定要改变自己

结束的十一月

1) 放假放到发霉了，真的得空到没事做
天天上网，游戏，打球，吃喝玩乐
今天去和朋友和小卢去harbour town
我买了件衬衫，这样一天又过了

2）3DEC 妈妈就要来了，参加姐姐的毕业典礼
算便来旅游，我负责开车带他们到处去走走
不过还没想要带他们去哪里玩

3）成绩出炉了，59-63-69-45,我竟然failed了
很久没发生酱的事情，令我那已接受阿
这下子真的完了，不知道怎么跟妈妈交待
一个科目的价钱又很贵，哎..........
怎么办呢？？apply paper review?

4）在这里恭喜我姐姐和全部年尾毕业的朋友们
我还真羡慕他们能够毕业了， 离开念书的日子
希望我也有酱的一天

5）心情简直掉到了谷底，表面嘻嘻哈哈的我
其实心里很烦，很担心，不知道如何是好
事实就是如此，其实也是预料之内了，
欠5分令我赶到很不服气，心情不好
因此也令到小卢也不好受

6）小卢帮我剪了个头发，谢谢你

7）之前去了CAIRNS，真的满好玩的
热带雨林，大保礁潜水看珊瑚
不过只去了3天2夜，我好像爱上了潜水

尽管假期多么的开心，最终也要接受失败的痛苦
天堂与地狱就只是一线之差。。。。

考完试....难忘的一天

今天是个难忘的一天啊...终于考完试了
早上8.30am 考试，竟然8.00am才起床
看到自己睡迟了，下到我脑袋空空阿
脸没洗，牙也没刷，换了衣服拿了东西就冲出去了
心理在祷告，希望耶稣帮帮我啊
皇天不负苦心人，虽然有点迟早了
总算给我赶上考试了，感谢主啊。
考完了这最后一科，虽然有机会卦掉
总之不理了，考完试我就放假咯~！！！

今天也是小卢的生日，我们都陪她过了
在家里煮了很多好吃的
我也买了个水果蛋糕给她。。。
希望她生日快乐。。哈

19nov 就要去凯英斯了
期待和兴奋下。。。

11月...考试咯

今天起床后告诉朋友我觉得时间过得很快
第二个学期即将结束了
只是在等考试
我有数日历的习惯
每当过一星期就在日历上画掉那星期
画下画下就一星期
过下过下就一个月
真的很快啊...........[o_o]''
对目前来说是个好事，将来就不知道了
考试真的很烦，很多要读要背
加油加油！！！！！努力！！！！！
希望这次考试全部科目都过
耶稣保佑阿........阿门

圣经里的10个经典句子

1、"生命在他里头，这生命就是人的光。光照在黑暗里，黑暗却不接受光。"（《新约·约翰福音》第1章）
What has come into being in him was life, and the life was the light of all people. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overcome it. "John 1-4,5"
这是是基督教神学思想的核心。这里的"光"指的是耶稣基督，"生命"指的是永生--战胜死亡，获得真理。

2、"你们要进窄门，因为引到灭亡，那门是宽的，路是大的，进去的人也多；引到永生，那门是窄的，路是小的，找着的人也少。"（《新约·马太福音》第7 章）
Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the road is easy that leads to destruction, and there are many who take it. For the gate is narrow and the road is hard that leads to life, and there are few wh o find it. "Matthew 7-13,14"
这是耶稣"登山宝训"中最短的一段，但却是整个新教精神的核心。对于清教徒而言，人生就意味着无尽艰险，就意味着走窄门。

3、" 爱是恒久忍耐，又有恩慈；爱是不嫉妒，爱是不自夸，不张狂，不作害羞的事，不求自己的益处，不轻易发怒，不计算人的恶，不喜欢不义，只喜欢真理；凡事包容，凡事相信，凡事盼望，凡事忍耐；爱是永不止息。"（《新约·哥林多前书》第1 3章）
Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious pr boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or re sentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. I t bears all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never end s.
基督教是"爱的宗教"，这就是使徒保罗对爱的诠释。从古到今不知有多少人因这段话而皈依基督教，可见"爱是无可比的"。

4、"死啊，你得胜的权势在哪里？死啊，你的毒钩在哪里？死的毒钩就是罪，罪的权势就是律法。感谢上帝，使我们借着我们的主耶稣基督得胜。"（《新约·哥林多前书》第15章）
Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting? The sting of death is sin, and. The power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
使徒保罗用优美的语言阐明了基督教的脉络：原罪与堕落，牺牲与救赎，胜利与永生。总体说来就是"用爱战胜死亡"。

5、"草必枯干，花必凋残，因为耶和华的气吹在其上；百姓诚然是草。草必枯干，花必凋残；惟有我们上帝的话，必永远立定！"（《旧约·以赛亚书》第40 章）
The grass withers, the flower fades, when the breath of the LORD blows upon it; surely the people are grass. The grass withers, the flower fades; but the word of our God will stand forever.
旧约的最大特点是"信念"。这句话就是无比坚定的信念，既是相信上帝，又是相信作为上帝选民的自己。以色列人的辉煌，大半缘自信念。

6、"我知道我的救赎主活着，末了必站在地上。我这皮肉灭绝之后，我必在肉体之外得见上帝。"（《旧约·约伯记》第19章）
For I know that my Redeemer lives, and that at the last he will stand up on the earth; and after my skin has been thus destroyed, then in my fles h I shall see God.
这是约伯的信念。无论承受多么巨大的打击、多么绝望的境遇，都不可放弃希望、放弃信仰。亨德尔为此句作的咏叹调也极为感人。

7、 "不可封了这书上的预言，因为日期近了。不义的，叫他仍旧不义；污秽的，叫他仍旧污秽；为义的，叫他仍旧为义；圣洁的，叫他仍旧圣洁。"（《新约·启示录》第22章）
Do not seal up the words of the prophecy of this book, for the time is n ear. Let the evildoer still do evil, and the filthy still be filthy, and the righteous still do right, and the holy still be holy.
我最开始就是看了《启示录》才倾向于基督教的。《启示录》中有很多让人不能不动容的话，这句只是其中代表而已。

8、"谁能使我们与基督的爱隔绝呢？难道是患难吗？是困苦吗？是逼迫吗？是饥饿吗？是赤身露体吗？是危险吗？是刀剑吗？……然而，靠着爱我们的主，在这一切的事上已经得胜有余了。"（《新约·罗马书》第8章）
Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will hardship, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? No, in al l these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.
圣保罗真是无与伦比的传道者，他的讲道是如此气势磅礴且发人深省。这段话继承了旧约的信心，增加了新约的爱，完美地体现了基督教精神。

9、"我又专心察明智慧、狂妄和愚昧，乃知这也是捕风。因为多有智慧，就多有愁烦；加增知识的，就加增忧伤。"（《旧约·传道书》第1章）
And I applied my mind to know wisdom and to know madness and folly. I perceived that this also is but a chasing after wind. For in much wisdom is much vexation, and those who increase knowledge increase sorrow.
《传道书》是旧约中我最喜欢的篇章之一，传道者的话虽低沉消极，却又蕴涵着希望。能够用来战胜愁烦和忧伤的，只有一件事："信仰"。

10、"哈利路亚！因为主我们的上帝，全能者作王了。……世上的国成了我主和主基督的国；他要作王，直到永永远远。……万王之王，万主之主。" （《启示录》第11、19章）
Hallelujah! For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns. The kingdom of the world has become the kingdom of our Lord and of his Messiah, and he wil l reign forever and ever.
这也是亨德尔歌剧《弥赛亚》中大合唱《哈利路亚》的歌词，它是至今唯一能让我多次热泪盈眶的歌曲。从这短短的几句话中我们可以看到无穷的胜利喜悦。欢呼吧！因为胜利属于我们。

The last week of 2nd sem, week13th

week 13th 了，也就是本学期最后一周，考试也即将到
昨天为了分数不对的事情跟老师吵架，差点跟她打起来
重来没跟老师吵架过终于在这里破功了
不过我没觉得我有什么不对的
我不要多不要少，只想拿回原本的分数
事实是她记录错误， 还说我们骗她只为了那几分
他不但没改还骂我们，真的有够过分的！！
由于coursework分数太低了，及格也是个不太可能的事
我打算withdraw这科，至少不会影响GPA
还以为耶稣关了一道门，也开了一扇窗给我....但是...
人算不如天算阿，今天去问了才知道如果drop掉
就当作是fail了，因为withdraw的时间过了
一样会影响GPA的，还会掉的跟凶
现在好烦阿，不知道该如何是好
也不敢告诉妈妈，也不知道该怎么开口了
现在想到的解决办法就是印着头皮去考
虽然知道是凶多吉少，肯定不及格了
能做就是不要让GPA掉的太凶
唉...这科真的是很多事情发生啊
都是接二连三的冲着我来的
我到底做错了什么啊~~~
主，我的祷告你听到看到知道了吗？
失望了~~~

希望渺茫

今天九点的课，累到不想去
经过一番挣扎后，还是决定去上课了
虽然迟到总好过没到
去到学校才知道class canceled
又没带到其他功课去做
只好上网打发时间直到上tutorial

终于 重改的作业成绩出来了
果然比预料之中的还要...糟糕
跟源本的分数一样，没有加减
重不重改根本就没差嘛
还给老师教训了一顿
看来这科就酱完了
今天真是‘衰’啊...!!!

明天又要交两分作业
真是没心情做了
现在的心情简直是跌倒了谷底
伤心到爆阿,感觉已经绝望了
我该怎么办了？我又能告诉谁呢？
很多人都说耶稣会帮助我
我真的看不到他给我的任何希望
接受耶稣后的第一件事
就是不及格 >_<''
也许也不能怪他...哎....

未来几个月的计划

假期中...
旅游行程（DFO, Moreton Island, Gold Coast, Harbor Town, City 山顶）
已经计划好这个星期的行程了
注定钱包肯定会缩水
有得必有失..哎
玩归玩，功课还没做完呢
还有很多东西烦
下星期有两份要交了
动都还没动..不过心中已有分寸
前几天收到老师的email，约我下周三见面
对我那份remarked assignment铁定不是什么好消息
这下真的完了~！已经做好最坏的大算了

aunty Amy上网跟我聊了一会儿
她终于说服我进了基督教
经过了很多事，其实自己也想进，也想找耶稣谈谈
妈妈知道后真的真的很开心
还特地打来给我，看来进教是个明智的选择

11月中就会考完试了
大概想好要去那里玩了
12月多我姐毕业典礼，家人都回过来参加
到时也要带他们去玩
过后他们就会回家，不过我没那么早回
过圣诞节..跨年..等等
我大概1月3号才回家咯
理由很简单，就是留在这里完和陪小卢

回到马来西亚后，就见见亲戚朋友
到处去跑跑，陪家人，驾车...哈
然后一起过年，妈妈又想趁过年去旅行
看来我有排忙了
过完年又要回澳洲....真的不想回澳洲了.
有些朋友去了英国念书了..真羡慕
不过我倒是有想要去美国
感觉上美国很不错，有机会去那里生活看看

不变就是最好的改变

assignments 真是烦死人了...靠！！
接下来每个星期四都有group negotiation.
后天拜五又要交一份。
妈妈已经过钱了，生活恢复正常
如果撇开学校的作业
在这里生活确实无忧无虑阿
天气，治安，吃的，住的，玩的，买的
五花八门应有尽有啊，
弄到我好像有点不想回了..哈哈

上个星期六是'river festival'
150年，酱都给我撞到
超壮观的..30分钟的烟花
还有花试飞机和战斗机
超帅的...^^永远不会忘记那一天

不知道家人和家乡的朋友过得怎样
希望他们跟我一样好啦

21_th 生日！！！

21岁了
以前都没想过会在澳洲过我的21岁生日
谁知道阿....哈哈
今天很开心
有很多朋友给我的祝福
今天跟朋友和housemates吃了大餐
他们很会煮....超好吃的
他们有送我礼物...我都很喜欢
谢谢你们....^^
哈...然后我们去了唱k ...
唱到我喉咙痛了，沙声>.<
我发觉，我唱歌真的不行...Lol
妈妈都有特地打电话给我，跟我说生日快乐...
第一次在外国过生日，还不错...
过完生日就要冲了阿
因为考试和assignments due了
就在这个星期~_~'''
最后，让我自己跟我自己说声...
‘’21岁生日快乐'' 吧....。

郁闷事件

事件1：
第二学期真的比第一来的难啊，功课难道要死
又不大清楚真真的是要什么，
真的是又跟不上的感觉，
那些group members也令我失望，
炸到！！

事件2：
钱钱钱....
我银行里没钱了，妈妈每次都进很少，
跟她开口要的时候，又好像不好意识，
然后她又会说我是不是乱乱花钱，
结果跟姐姐拿了。

事件3：
今天打球状态不好，
才吃了面包就去了， 打到一半就饿到死了，
没力了，还被别人羞辱，他妈的，
下次打球一定报仇。

事件4：
我想搬家了，但是又没钱，
想一个人住，换一下新的环境，
可能是我性格的关系，会让人误解，我也不爽，
不太会跟别人相处。

事件5：
我的烂鬼电脑，真是给它气死，
我上网下载和跟朋友拿了很多游戏来玩，
结果几乎一个都装不上， 玩不到，
靠~！烂到死，回去了一定把‘你’卖掉。

第二站

现在开学的第一个星期
这学期的科目比上学期的难
压力渐渐的回来了
预料之中
假期也去了满多地方玩的
玩到心散了

在开学的前2天
我病了
病到现在，真是莫名其妙
病到七彩酱
现在已经好很多了

这段时间里
她很照顾我
帮我煮饭，煮粥，弄药，买药，买吃的，陪我，做家务
她自己也说像个保姆一样
哈哈
真的很感激你 （n_n）

还有我上个学期的成绩出了
都过了
觉得考的还不错
哈哈

现在是有点担心这个学期了
老实说
还满难的，完了 〉《
第二学期就像第二站一样
我竟然跨过了第一站
来带这里
真不容易啊

6_月的结束

6月的结束，也就是7月的开始
扎下眼已经7月了
仿佛就那一瞬间
寒假过了一个星期，有时真的冷到~~~
之前才去过 harbour town 玩
买了双篮球鞋
不过目前大多数时间都在家上网，看戏，打篮球，聊天，打dota..
宅男一名。

等朋友回来
然后去movie world..
超期待的， 很多朋友已经去过了
看照片感觉很好玩....

另一方面又担心我的成绩
刚刚妈妈打电话来
叫我努力，努力还是努力
叫我好好读书..
令到我感到压力和担忧阿。

希望能过咯
我可以的，加油
哈勒鲁亚~
至于人与人之间的关系
很矛盾，不知道怎么办
复杂啊~~
船到桥头直燃至？！
希望一切顺利。

即将结束的<学期一>

好久没来写了
最近都在忙考试
拜二考了一个
然后拜五六
连续考两个
今天也刚刚考完第三科
又多又难
累到醒.......!!
读书读到晚上
然后早早要去图书馆读书等考试
下一科考试在下拜二
至少现在可以休息下下了
考完试一定要玩到傻

最近看到个东西
表面上好像没事了
不过心里就是有点不爽
就心酸酸的吧
是吃醋介意吗？
哎，管我什么事呢

感觉时间过很快
下拜二考完了酱就过了一个学期
希望能pass完咯
有好一阵子没跟国内的亲戚朋友联系了
希望他们过得好

*嘉

最近的我....

好久没来写部落格了，因为最近都没空，
也没什么特别的事发生。
现在是 week 11th ， 还有两个星期就开始期末考的时间，
压力大已经是家常便饭了...烦...!!

开始要进入冬天了，冷到我~~~~~~~~~
都还没到真正的冬天，就已经 17 - 18 度了，
靠...还真的有点受不了了。

这几天，有几个好友生日，刚刚才吃了个生日蛋糕。
因为距离的关系，有些就没办法跟他们庆祝了，
祝他们生日快乐~！

最近，心情很复杂。就是 .....
都不知道自己在干嘛。
有些事情和承诺我必须去做的， 但是我做不到。
有些事情和承诺我可以做到的， 但是我不能去做。
有些事情和承诺我很想去做的， 但是我没那个机会。
究竟要怎么办了？？
心里面很伤心内疚，可能是辜负了某些人吧。

感觉最近的我好像做着一些没用的事，
还有在不适当的时间，做不适当的事，
真的有够苯的...

还有很多想写，不知道怎样写，晚安~
to be continue.....

朋友

其实没什么要写的
这些只是自己的心情罢了
不知不觉来了这里已经 77天了，下星期是week 9th了
没什么特别的，功课一样多，一样难，一样不会做。
不同的是，我不会再去抱怨生活上的困难，
可能慢慢都习惯了，可能懂得如何解决了，或者是已经麻木了。。

最近会想回已前的的事情
都过去了，不懂还想来做什么，控制不了。
也很想马来西亚的朋友，很少跟他们联络了
怀念在一起玩和上课的时候
各个都长大了，读书的读书，做工的做工,结婚的结婚，
都在不同的地方生活，不同的生活方式，
不同的话题，不同的遭遇，不同的朋友。

‘天下无不散的宴席’
这句话很可怕，也许是我怕失去朋友吧。
也可能是我自私吧，不想所有朋友离开我
以前小时候觉得大人为什么那么闷，
都不跟朋友出去玩的
之后我才知道他们是很想去的，
只是被工作，家庭，生活锁得很紧。

中学毕业后慢慢体会到这种感觉了
毕业后大家都很开心，很自由，做什么都可以
每次出来聚会的人都很多，出去玩的次数也很多
慢慢的从很多到很少。
有些不得空，有些没回来，有些不想出去，
有些去了别的地方，甚至有些没什么联络了。

之后，每次出来的就那几个人
可能是我太得空了吧，每次聚会我都会去。
我去了英迪读书，我每个礼拜都会回来
回来第一件事就打电话给朋友，问他们有没有在芙蓉
结果大多数都不在。
当下心情觉得好‘低’哦
想聚一聚都不行。。然而慢慢就习惯了
他们也有自己事要忙。

大家都往外跑了，向各自的目标前进
这种离别的感觉就像失恋一样，甚至更痛
渐渐的疏远，真是千百万个不舍得和不愿意啊。
我一个小学老师在毕业前曾对我们说过：
‘你们现在很讨厌老师打骂你们，也很高心即将离开这里，当你们长大后就会怀念过去在学校里的点点滴滴，酸甜苦辣，和朋友一起念书打闹的日子。’

我了解了~~~~

15/4 我的爸爸

今天是爸爸的生日。。

我真不孝，人不在马来西亚，没办法去看他

今天竟然还玩到忘了。。。

哎

对不起~~！！！

都不知他现在在那里

也许他在遥远的地方默默看着我

也许他在骂我没有用没出息

也许他忘了我

也许没有也许

有时还满羡慕有爸爸的小孩

有爸爸疼，有爸爸爱，有爸爸保护

什么困难或事情都可以告诉他

就像有一座靠山让你靠着，什么事都没在怕的

不过他们不会体会到我的现在的心情

觉得人长得越大，身边的人（家人，朋友，亲人，爱人）

都渐渐和自己遥远，渐渐的消失，离开。

真怀念以前的日子

虽然极短，但是很实在，和其他的小朋友一样

甚至生活过得更好，无忧无虑，什么都有

现在事情也过了很久，生活还过得去

要是跟以前相比，简直是从天堂掉进地狱

大家，请珍惜你现在所拥有的

尤其是家人和亲人。

一场不想再解释的误会~PEACE

顶~~~超伤心的~！！

我又在做什么 , 我既然漠不关心这个误会
过往的我甚至一个小小的误会或事情我都要解释到半死
解释到对方完全了解和相信为止
为什么这次我解释了, 但就不管对方相信或不相信
而且对方还是对我来说一个很重要的人

我从来没有说过那种话, 也作出了解释
很明显这当中有表达上的误解
为什么她就不相信我
哎... 也不能怪别人
也许我的信誉已经破产了吧
根本不值得信任... 哈

这场误会可能会让我付出很大的代价
可能会没了一个我很在乎的人
我解释了, 虽然得不到对方的相信, 但我也不想再继续解释了
为什么呢
我也不知道
或许是不是误会对她来说根本已经不重要了
我的解释和结果只会带给她困扰

对不起~~

******完******

Week 6th...^_^

Long time no blogging ady..
because seem like nothing to write~
what actually happening during this period?
Erm..
went to class, study, assignments, miss someone and went to Lone Pines(zoo).
the trip was really happy...
saw many kangaroos and kola bears..and others...hehe^^

Only have 13 weeks within in 1 semester...
The time is going so fast, then now is ady Week 6th Thursday..
next week Monday need to submit assignment and mid-term..
i needs to continue my hardworking attitude..
(really unbelievable)..haha

last week, Melbourne got Formula ONE Australia GP..haha..
but i din attend the race, just watched at TV (T_T)
This week is turn to M'sia GP..hehe~

Love is depend on the time?
who came first , who get first ?
If yes, then im late jor~~ =.=


****END****

You Drive Me Crazy....stressful !!!!!!!!!

Next Monday is my week 5th in QUT,
im really feel stressful,
i have 4 subjects within this Semester..
but its really hard to catch up to their tempo..

What are the problems??
Of coz, the main reason that is i have poor in English..
..example : those local take 10 minute to finish read a article..
that i might take 20 minute or even more longer to done it.

2) different of environment
3) people
4) live style
5) culture
6) english slang
......

As my friends said, we come here suppose should ALREADY know all about of the things,
all the way...
but we are newcomer...many things we still have no idea..
communication is another big problem..not only cause by poor english,
but is those local like to complicate even a simple thing.
its necessary to do that ??
FxxK..

Besides, 1 lecture is included 2 chapters in the text book
how to read o?? that is too much and thick.
i even cant finish read it...and then assignments is the following.
That is A LOT and Difficult...!!

im really feel stress..my friends too..
we always shout in the room..haha..
but i have no disclose and show out my stress
i pretending nthg in front of people..
because i just keep inside the heart..
suddenly felt im not their level..

Many people thought come Australia study is a good dream,
is a wonderful thing...
its because they dun know what is the REAL happen at here..
that is not easy as their think..
if can choose again..i prefer study at M'sia to finish my degree..
at least i won't lost my LOVER...

I have choose to came here, its a wrong decision for me ???
who knows ~~
gambateh....all the best~~!!

0.00000000 %

Today same as usual
5pm class until 8pm ...then went back to home.
nothing special

During the way to home on bus,
Lian sms me, said she keep fever and suffering there..
i really get shocked..i thought she was recovered
mana tau........

She suffering ...i quite worry there..haiz
i consoled her and asked her rest more..such things,
but i still worrying,but i can do nothing.
afterward i requested Miss Banana go to her house and visit her..
see whether she fine or not..

Unfortunately, miss Banana have no transport at that time,
OMG~!! how? =.=''
then i asked her to call Lian...
much later~
miss banana replied me , said Lian was nothing..just a little bit blur blur and cold..
and her bf brought foods and take care her..

bf? suppose to feel NOOOO!!! and Down when heard this,
definitely i am..
but think properly, she is sicking..
got somebody take care her i also 'Fang Xin'
at least he can do more to Lian than i can NOW..
im 'sui jor'

Get well soon~~

Wish you get well soon ^^

She is sicking...
i quite worry her, but i unable to do anything.
Take care...drink more water..rest more..sleep earlier..
wish her get well soon..
these are what i can do right now...

Heard from someone she is Paktuo already..
its truth or not ??? T_T
for me of coz hope is not..
i don't know...and
i have no idea...i cant control..haizZZ

i just said i should release my hand ,
but..did i really do that ?
haha.....seem like so funny..

OKOK..stop writing here...
should not be sad today..
hey miss banana , don't slap me plzzz..^_^!!!!!!!

Wish you get well soon~
take care yourself a lot yaa~
miss u :)
happy always XD

犯溅的我

Today no class for me
but im really 'Fan Jian'
early woke up at the morning...after washed my face..
then guai guai went to studied..
until afternoon..phew~

i dated with friends went to near by basketball ply ball..
when we were arrived there, we starting to warm up ..
there was only few people plying there just now..
no much later, suddenly got 4 local guys invited us to join and have a competition..
then we go lo..

they were so pro, fast and tall...
wah, someone even can slam dunk....WTF, still need to play meh =.=
all under expectation,
we loose =.='' that was nothing to curious..


Second,
Lian today followed campus went to KL parliament and Mid-Valley.
syok~~~
i long time didn't go there already...haiz.
she quite happy today...can play whole day le...haha
she happy i also felt happy ^^

we Msn just now...and talked a lot..
she asked me ,her birthday present should take Nokia 5800 mobile phone or have a trip to Thailand ??
i said choose the trip is better.., she think so~

Afterward i continue to asked her,
who offering these 2 presents to let her choose..? i thought is her Baba n Mama.
she answer me, is her Bao Bei...
OMG, Bao Bei?? i get shocked..
who is the BaoBei?its him?? or her just kidding?
or maybe i think too much and misunderstanding her
haha..

after i heard this, i really felt down...
why i wanna to asked, im really Fan Jian enough..
i blamed myself , if want to asked then don't want felt down... T_T
Guan Wo Shen Me Shi ~~!!!!!!
haizz..

If i have money i will give her also,
even a better than these two..
unfortunately, now i don't have....=.=
im useless..

sometime i will think, its i cannot compared with Mr.I ??
which part of me worse than him ??
why Lian will treated him better than me??
why Lian so like him but not me??
even broke up with him, Lian still called him Bao Bei..

maybe love should not occur these kind of stupid questions..
if must have a answer for those questions..
that is 'dun like then dun like, no why'

Miss Banana chatted to me yesterday..
i told her i miss Lian
she asked me don't think too much about it,
its time for me to ''WAKE UP''
...errm...i told her Yes, i will ..i know...
but did i ???..>.<
i have gave too much stress and tears to her. Sry
is time to release my hand.


phew~~
anyway, she happy then is enough for me right now.
i wish her...when i have go back to M'sia.
believe im totally changed...
i will try my best to get her...hope that time i still have a little bit chance~!
hehe^^

but what i scare is...i got life to go back to Msia? haha
who knows? !

please SMILE :)

hi, what's up Cutie~ happy~

Today so Happy er...
I chatted with Lian very much...haha
we seem like can tell each other everything..
but i know still got difference comparing to the past..
but i have satisfied and because i no dare to request more than..
Im felt we getting closer , not distance but is heart..
( i think too much jor)..
hahhaa...
i miss u.



Another thing , Today i was chatted to my new housemate YiPing
i have discovered,
she like formula one too...especially Kimi Raikkonen..
hahha...that was unblieveable..because seldom girls like to watch F1.
haha...


I found a old English song..
its suitable to me...
to my world of heart..
" That's Why You Go Away"

''....baby , won't you tell me why?,
there is sadness in yours eyes,
i don't wanna say goodbye to you,
love is one big illusion,
i should try to forget,
but there's something left in my head....''



Forgive me cannot forget you..
i miss you ^^

raining day~ + Add oil my frenssssss...

Mid-night of the Monday,
Recently the weather was unpredictable...keep changing one.
but today was rain..the sky turned to dark color at 5pm
raining made me feel comfortable..and cold~~

Today my class from 9am to 4pm..
Im tired but satisfied.
honestly , the lecture class was really boring n make me felt sleepy..
i tou tou sleeping there...hahaa..
dun peixi me..

Tonight dinner so good..im have no need to cook..haha
because Yi Ping gave us some foods ,
we just microwave it and eat...but that was insufficient to make me Full..
afterward i warm the Meat Pie and eat again..haiz..

What im doing just now?
online chatting with Lian and friends ,browsing internet, thinking business concept, come out with the draft ,
i have decided to set up a Comic bookstore for my assignment,
so far i have the main idea and points to do it...phew~~ thankx U~~
and now blogging lo..nothing to do also. plus lazy study..hehe.

Just now i recalled back my photo comments at Friendster...
hahha...that was funny and made me memorize a lot of the past...
especially Lian...haha
she now went out to Yam Cha jor...^^
i miss her ~

Today i have found a song so nice,
which sang by Joanna...songs name - ' Vincent' and ' times of your life'
that were appropriated for Raining Day...
tomorrow i have class at 11am to 2pm..only 3 hours..
not bad not bad...

i have Msn with Mok just now, he said he everything in Seremban was fine and disappointed to nowadays girls..
hahha....
because he felt most of the girls just like Handsome and Money $$$$..
izzit true?? hahha...
honestly , that was not only girls, some boys also like that one...
that was the ' trend of the world' ... >.<

Mok ah Mok ,that is not necessary to worry too much about it,
if you unable to change the world, then pls change and improve yourself bah,
increase your ability ,and no need to think negative...
before i have also negative thinking about love...but now i getting mature of my mind , maybe that was forced by the environment here...haha

Ermm...just put effort as much as possible...
same as me, i can do nothing to her at this moment, but this doesn't mean i have give up to her...maybe you will think izzit me too foolish ..?!
izzit i should not loving on her ?!
actually im NOT stupid~ hahhaa...
Love is not a business, how much you paid not necessary equalize to what you will get or return..
i also don't know what will going on tomorrow..,and don't know can get back with her or not...hahha...but doesn't matter first, just do what you want..
until now i was no regret,
the only 1 reason why i still persisting to her, that is because got 'LOVE' .

haha, Gambateh bah my friendsssssssss...
good night ^^ have a nice day ^^

Autumn is Coming...

Phew~ these few days, the wind was strong..
izzit autumn is coming ? i think so...
haha..

Today i was studies for whole day, but really a lot haven't touch yet,
and didn't turn on my laptop also...rajin leh...hehe
Afterward i went to play basketball with my friends at evening time,
i have a fun with playing ,but i was injured with my left hand.
damn painful~~

what i was ate tonight?
spegetti ~!!..i was ate this food until sienzz jor
T_T because other foods of material was finished..
but just now planned go to buy...but today is Sunday,
supermarket all would closed at 6pm....they were really ever Ci-Sin .

Tomorrow is the starting for my Week 4th of this semester.
so fast..i came here was already 1 month more..
dunknw how M'sia and my friends , families are going on now~~
wish they are fine.

Lian on9 jor...she finished her one week holidays.
but she hardworking for assignments + exam during the time..
really look like good girl and special..
Tomorrow is her Mid-Term exam , now she is studying hard over there ,
and planned to overnight..
come on take care la.~haha..
wish You & Jiao good luck here ^^

now i keep browsing web pages..
already lazy to study now...hehe
tomorrow 9am class until 3pm...its most busy day of the week !
but i needed to go there earlier..
because haven't print out my notesssss..

today know my new housemate, she came from china..
came here already 1 year...how she able to living this stupid Brisbane..
here damn boring and stupid...
i felt wanna go back when first day i was been here..

Its enough for today...im hungry right now...ahhhh
then i stop here ~_~'
finally i show my latest photo which took at room just now.
hahha.....paiseh~~

Just A normal day for Me..

Sunday ,1am++

Errm...what i did today ( Saturday )?
Woke up -> study -> cook and eat -> movie -> play basketball -> dinner -> study..
Pheww~~ what a boring day!!!
izzit you same with me? hahha

Actually tonite planned to go my sister house for her Birthday celebration,
but i was absented.
Because i have tired after play ball and it was too late to there..

But today my mood so down also..
what is the reason ? suddenly i have no idea..
maybe i missing her..errrm...
not maybe is definitely... >.<''

AAahhh...what i still thinking for ?!
did i cisin jor ( mad) ??
or i think too much of her?
still got chance ?
haiz~~
that was no answer..
forget about it first.
but i really love her right now.

Just now i sms a friend called Jiao (banana)
i told her before , if i mention i miss Lian again..then let her slap me!
hahaa..i failed jor, finally i told her , i miss Lian..but she didn't slap me,
and no reply..maybe running out of credit..
but doesn't matter la....hahaa.

Still remember i visited my friend's blog,
his life pictures at Melbourne was wonderful~~~
comparing to here ( Brisbane)...
Brisbane life like a shit...and here is nothing at all.
wish i can leave here as soon as possible.

midnight right now.. Jesus , where are YOU ??
are you beside me? i need your helps.
its time to offline and sleep..
good night ~

Lian, when we are going to meet again and again ?!
i missing that time we was together.
Sorry..
i miss you vry vry much v(^.^v)

sadness..+.+ promised

I ''shi lian'' jor.. T_T
But already 2 weeks more ago...
i seem like gave up ,but actually NOT..
until this moment, im pretty sure im still love her...izzit funny and stupid??
haha...ya,i think so~!
actually im Damn sad..
for covered my sadness, i have trial to pretending happy in front of her and others people.

Im very miss her right now.
Dunknw how she doing now..wish she is fine..
Who can i tell with my unhappy stories? Frens? Families ?
NOoo..!! I dun think so
but never mind , i got 'BLOG'..haha

Sometime still keep sms and msn with her..
i really felt want tell her , '' im MISS u vry vry much''
but i din..and controlled myself,
bcz im know she dun like im like that...i just want she happy.

When that time i was 'shi lian'
i felt wanna give up my educations and go back Malaysia..
im felt down...and stressful, bcz all unexpected stuffs are happened in Australia.
after someone consoled me..,im think deeply and clear my mind.
im decided continue staying at here.

After 2 weeks ago, im felt my thinking getting mature..
i knw i love her vry much , but not '' blind love''
we still young..whether can be with her in future ? i dunknw , but i wish~!
If i love her, i should be able to give her the best i can..that is why i cannot give up my academic.

What i can do now?
put effort to my education, make myself different ...like no others..
i have never forgot the promised..
and i not allow disappointed to those who put expectation to me !!!

I MISS YOU...

First time blogging..

Hi evryone for who visiting my blog..
This is my 1st time blogging ..im english is poor..hope u all can undstnd >.<
why im created a blog?
Bcz i am feel so SIENZZ.., down , stressful and sad (bcz shi lian) haha..
Suddenly dunknw wan to say what..haiz
ermm~~....nice to meet u all ^_^